It was all Anil's fault.
I think by now my colleagues in the Zurich office are fully aware of my lunch idiosyncrasies. Despite being a self-professed foodie, I am not a fussy eater when the situation is a working day lunch. The only thing I do not want is bad food (yeah, you have heard me say that life is too short to eat bad food) or, ahem, a certain kind of service.
"Anybody want to go eat?"
I get two positive responses. Jasmin & Anil. Cool. Jasmin has just joined us and it would be interesting - nah, that's such a boring word, let's say educative - to have her join for lunch.
When Anil reminds us that the Renaissance hotel next door has granted our company a 20% discount for lunch there, it seems like a good idea to go there. As we set out, I ask Jasmin if she has been there. She did grow up in the area, but the hotel is a recent addition to the landscape. No, she says. It's a strange hotel, I say. Why, she asks? It just is, I say, unable to expand on the subject. As people who know me well can appreciate, I am often at a loss for words.
The street that connects the office building to the hotel has been closed for months to allow for construction activity. (The Swiss and construction ... ah well, that's another story.) Replacing it is a narrow, precarious pedestrian path / platform that has become unfriendly because of the planks and screws used and the heavy snow that covers it. It reminds me of the mountain paths that one drives on in the snow. Everyone knows who has right of way, until someone does not.
But I digress. This is a story about lunch.
We get to the Equinox and ask for a table for 3. Anil flashes his business card and tells the waiter that he expects a 20% discount on his meal. We get a table in a dark corner, and do the Swiss thing of ordering a drink first.
Then things start to go to all hell fast.
I am happy with the Linguini with Tiger Prawns (knowing fully well that the tigers will turn out to be pussycats) and no starter. Perhaps I set the wrong example. The others follow suit. The waiter asks us twice if we want an appetizer, and we say no. Not just that, we later say no to dessert and coffee as well. By now, I can see tendrils of smoke escaping his ears. Here we are, at what might be considered a posh restaurant, and all we order is a drink and a main course. And a 20% discount.
I ask Anil to pay and we get the check. No discount included. He asks for one. The waiter disclaims all knowledge of it. We ask him to check with his supervisor. He comes back 5 minutes later and says that his supervisor is not available. We insist. More scowls. More delays.
But we do finally get the discount, and leave with the distinct impression that we have been blacklisted. We walk back the perilous path to the office fearing occasionally for our health. The pasta was ok but the rest of the experience was ... well, let's just say that we would have kissed the Thai girls at the Asian takeaway next door in preference.
It was all Anil's fault.
